Suspension of Disbelief

Birthday Suit

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Every year we look forward to several holidays, several occasions we save up for, we plan vigorously and spend it as a time to release our inhibitions, take off our tired shoes and just lay back. But, there are few celebrations we just want to pass and just pretend it didn’t happen.




Last week, I attended my office, ANC’s, Christmas party. It’s one of the celebrations I was looking forward to; really, it’s been like forever since we have our very own Christmas party. Usually, we’re just squatting with the NCAD group to celebrate our Christmas party, which usually ends up, the NCAD people having all the fun. But this year was really different, Ms. Glenda, our COO, made sure that we will have our very own party, and indeed, it was a success.


It was a double celebration for me. Halfway through the party, Ms. Glenda announced that ANC will also have 10/10 awardees like the 20/20 awardees of the NCAD group. 20 for the twenty awardees and 20 for the twenty-thousand pesos each of the awardees will receive. Our version, ANC’s version, 10/10.


I kept going back to the toilet to unload; I have been drinking since the party started. I promised myself that I will hydrate myself with liquor that night, and so I did; a mixture of San Mig Light, Colt 45, Bailey’s, Whisky, and a shot of Tequila.


As I walk back to the party hall, I heard Ms. Glenda calling my name, I think she repeated it twice or three times, I rushed in. She asked me to go into the front, to accept the certificate and to give a little a speech. I was one of the 10/10 awardees.


I was blank for a minute, all I could say was, OMG. And then, Ms. Maria Ressa walked closer to me and said, “Congratulations Patrick, you did well this year.” I was awakened after hearing her congratulating me.


I was shaking, shocked, I thanked everyone: “Korina Today – the show who taught me everything and the program I’ve been with the longest and Patricia Evangelista for releasing the BE(A)ST in me, Ms. Glenda – for trusting me and giving me the chance to show my talent and capabilities, and  Ms. Maria Ressa”.


For a minute I thought I already thanked everyone who shaped me in the past two years, and as I returned the microphone to Ms. Glenda, I realised, I forgot to thank Mr. Tony Velasquez, the host of RNG (Regional Network Group)-driven program Crossroads who have been so good to me. I’m unworthy.


And so I’m taking this opportunity to thank Mr. Tony Velasquez, for trusting his video inserts and editing of his program to me every week and for keeping his patience level up  – even if I fail to attend our weekly meeting and sometimes fail to deliver my 100% to his program.


After leaving the front of the hall, Cris Malapit walked towards my direction and gave me another bottle of San Mig Light. He said, “We need to celebrate Patrick!” We continued to drink the whole night, I lost count of how many bottles of beer and brands of alcohol I submerged myself into, but it was worth it.




Today, December 26, 2008, I turn 22. Most of my friends are in their respective provinces, spending their holiday with their family. Jeff is not replying to any of my messages, Nicole is in Olongapo, enjoying the marines, Bernard is too busy with his boyfriend, and I just got an SMS from Anton saying that he’s back from his Batangas trip, and oh, B.G. is in Batangas with Raymond.


So far, no plans yet for my birthday, just the traditional birthday dinner with my family. I persuaded Anton to join us in the dinner and just figure something after.


It’s only three in the afternoon, I don’t know if I’m feeling less or bored, my friends greeted me for my birthday, and yet I’m still feeling down. I’m guessing — the best birthday present I received is the 10/10 award from ANC, but who knows what’s in store for me tonight.


I’m still choosing what to wear for my birthday dinner, I have three different tops. I can go with the usual “Malate kid” look a.k.a. my everyday polo shirt, or my new blue plaid button-down short or the red version of it. Ahh!




A year of my life just ended, I remember last year; I swore to myself that I will wear an optimistic attitude towards work, friends, and looking for “the one”. But as I look back to the things I have done and accomplished in the past year, I got into thinking, “Are we getting older and wiser or just older?”


I manage to succeed on most of my dwellings; in my work, my friends – I fixed all the loopholes between, but I still managed to forget the thing that will make me happy and to keep me smiling after a hard day at work, a relationship. I’m tormented every time I think of it.


It’s been more than two years now that I have been single. I just realised it’s hard to type the word “single” after spending another year with no accomplishment in the column of “relationship”. It’s true.   


Today, that year ended, and a new year will begin. New hopes will come, new guys will come and make me cry, and new friends will come to make my life more colourful and new opportunities will open work-wise.


Is it high time to stop waiting for something and just remain optimistic? Or is it the right time to wear high hopes and expectations for my birthday until the next big day comes?               




Written by Patrick King Pascual

December 26, 2008 at 7:15 am

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